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The Baby Shower

By Robin Elise Weiss, LCCE, About.com

Baby showers have been around a long time. I suspect that they are an invention of a Hallmark type organization, but I haven't found any historical information on the traditional baby shower. Despite the lack of information, baby showers bring many different feelings. Let's look at some baby showers ideas, and thoughts from real moms and dads.

Should we have a shower?

It used to be that only the first baby had a shower. However, there are many schools of thought on who has a shower and when.

"Every baby! It makes the mommy feel special," exclaims one mom.

"I don't know, I think after the first, you have all the equipment... but it would be nice to have a little something for this baby," says another, "to help the parents get started with getting stuff together for the baby... among other things."

Alison reminds us that there are reasons to delay or not have showers, "I didn't have any showers because everybody was worried I would lose the baby. And afterwards I don't want all those people coming over when I'm just getting to know the baby."

In fact in some cultures or religions, Judaism, for example. It is not considered proper to have a shower before the birth of the baby or even to bring baby things in the house. In Judaism it is considered bad luck to bring baby things home before the baby because it would alert the evil spirit Lilith to the fact that there was to be a new baby in the house.

Theme for showers

There are so many options about what to do about the party itself. Do you do a theme, just a plain baby shower or what?

I asked around and was surprised to hear that a lot of people are using themes for showers. Here is a listing of themes that I found:

  • Baby Safety Shower (Presents are all of a safety nature.)
  • Mom's Shower (Gifts to pamper mom.)
  • Couples Shower (Both mom and dad present.)
  • Nursery Theme Showers (Based on the theme of the nursery.)
  • Dads Shower (Gifts for dad like Tylenol, coffee, etc.)

"Couple showers, definitely," remembers Nina. "Its his baby too."

"Hubby came when it was time for cake and stuff to thank everyone, and a few people bought him some things," offers Lissa.

What about games?

How many of you avoid showers because of the games that are played? Have you tasted enough baby food in your life to never care to see another one of those little jars? Never fear, the good games are here!

The easiest way to go about this is to spend a few dollars and you can buy the premade shower games, with several copies of the games, and a few extra ideas. Although I have been to a few showers where some really creative people have made up their own games and they were a lot of fun, and original!

"For my sister's last shower I took the guest list and wrote the meaning of their name and what others thought when they heard the name (According to the Baby Name Personably Book.) And made it a matching. That was unusual and everyone had fun," says Anna.

"My aunt had us put paper plates on our heads and try to draw pictures of me (the pregnant one)," laughs Bridget. "Not only was it hilarious at the time, but I saved them and put them in the baby's book."

Just remember to avoid shower games that might be offensive or hurtful.

Don't forget the presents and the cake!

Lissa points out that, "To celebrate the birth of the baby, no one needs to bring anything but a hug of congratulations."

However, for those who do wish to bring gifts, there are numerous ideas available. Nowadays there are a ton of baby shower registries available. If you are having a surprise shower you can have the dad register for the family or another relative.

"Diapers are a great present," smiles Cathy. "My family/friends brought me them... all different sizes."

From diapers and other practical gifts to the fun gifts of beautiful clothing, soft blankets, and wild toys, there is something for everyone.

Inexpensive and free gifts are also welcome in a lot of cases. One of the great ideas I heard was a coupon book for free babysitting and housecleaning.

"My other "best gifts" were lots of used clothing from other moms," says Dana.

Cindy jokingly says, "I just want a shower to get cake."

Cake and food are a great thing about showers. My personal favorite is that I always get my favorite punch for showers. Keeping the food simple is important to me, but others prefer actually serving a meal. This is really up to the hostess or host.

The only cut and dry menu rules are to avoid things that the pregnant mother herself would not eat. I would include alcohol in this, while others do not.

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